thea @ casa san pablo

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thea welcomes summer 2008

HAPPY MOTHER's DAY!

I went to a family friend’s wedding recently. Met up with some good friends, had some wonderful food, … all in all, a good time was had.

This will be the second marriage for our family friend. Her first marriage ended when her two sons were still in elementary school. Her boys are now both in their 20s ~ fine young men who have made us all very proud.

Thinking about how our family friend struggled as a single mom really made me appreciate my being a single mom to Thea and what she had to do to provide a nurturing, supportive, and loving home for her sons.

I don’t know if I could ever do as well as she did. I am in awe of all single parents who raise their children alone, and often without the help of the non-custodial parent.

According to the U.S. census, there were more than 10.4 million single mothers in 2007 and another 2.3 million single dads. The report I read didn’t say how many of these single parents received support from the other parent. Based on my own experiences, and those of my friends, there isn’t always an involved second parent.

This isn’t a bashing of non-custodial parents, it’s in praise of all those parents who do the near impossible to provide wonderful homes for their children.

It is in praise of all those parents who were both mother and father to their children. Who saw that their children could play sports or have music lessons, while giving up many of the things they enjoyed. It is in praise of those parents who were involved in their children’s school when they barely have extra time to sleep. It is in praise of all those parents who found ways to provide a safe, happy home, and still finding quality time to spend with their children.

It is for Kathy and Tetet who are raising great kids to be even better adults. It is for Maru, Racell and Yel who are brave enough to chronicle their struggles as single parents with no excuses. This is for Jones who was left to raise his daughter when his ex-partner decided she wanted something different in her life. This is for all those who raised their children as single parent and found new love to share their empty nest.

As a single mom, I can tell you that our children will grow up and will appreciate our sacrifices and come to know what it took for us to provide for them. When they become parents of their own children, they will finally understand what miracles we have really accomplished.

This is an open letter to all my friends who are or have been single parents ~ I applaud you and marvel at your strength and character. Our children are truly lucky to have us as their champion.